Back in the summer of 1989, I was at my home duty station of the army reserves as a weekend warrior in San Pablo, California. One Sunday afternoon, one of my fellow reservists (a young Spec4) showed me and two other reservists a turkey in the trunk of his car as we were getting ready to go home after drill. A "wild" tom. He showed me the handgun he took the bird with: a Springfield Armory 45. I believe he had special bird-shot shells for that pistol. He claimed to have shot it roadside that morning on his way to drill right near his hometown of Hollister. Crazy story, indeed! I hate to think what would have happened to him if the law caught wind of it. The tom must have been rather tame to have gotten in range of a handgun.
Sometime in 1992, I was driving in my pickup truck at night in the hilly back roads of Marin County, CA. There was a large herd of 'tame' does right out on the intersection. They were so docile they practically walked right up to the window of my truck. I happened to have had a 45 of my own in the truck: a Colt's Series 70 Govt. Model and some FMJ rounds. The devil was tempting me but God intervened, thankfully. I pointed my gun at one of the deer then thought better than to shoot the doe. I mean what if some farmer or rancher heard the gunshot and called the sheriff. I also thought to myself, I don't know how to even skin, gut and butcher a deer anyway. Ever since then, I've perished the thought of game poaching. A few years later, I would go on a legal deer hunt, my first deer hunt, with a guide in Trinity County, CA, deer zone B2, and his two adult sons helped the father, my guide, gut, skin, wash and quarter the yearling buck I took with my Leupold-Gold-Ring-Vari-X-scoped Browning A-Bolt II .25-06 on his Hayfork, CA ranch.
Once when I was young I went to an establishment which offered gentlemanly entertainment. As was and is my habit, I removed my size 8 1/4 Resistol hat, as there were ladies present, and placed it on the table. After some period of time I made a trip to the restroom. When I returned I found that a young woman had put my hat on and was dancing around my table. She did not have my hat on her head and I noticed that it was a good fit. She gave me my hat back, I thanked her and left.
This morning I woke up, and felt a light pressure in my lower abdomen. After laying there a minute or two, I got up and walked into the bathroom. There I stood directly in front of the toilet, leaned down and raised the lid and seat. I stood up straight, grabbed my "member" with my right hand, took careful aim and released the fluid that had build up inside of me. As the pressure in my lower abdomen eased, I began to feel better.